Wow “kissing” is such a dumb word
“Face battle” sounds way cooler
“may i challenge you to a face battle my good lady”
you may face battle the bride
face battle me in the rain
You don’t like me? Yeah well you can face battle my ass.
Just when I thought I’d seen everything
Face battling your ass
If I’m a sarcastic asshole when I talk to you its either because I really like you and feel comfortable teasing you
Or I really hate you and don’t care if you know it
Good luck figuring out which one
So my professor was asking questions.
- Professor: Who plans on getting married within the next 5-10 years?
- Like 3 people: *raises hand*
- Professor: Who plans on never getting married?
- Me: *raises hand*
- Professor: *points me out* why?
- Me: It's illegal.
- Professor: touche.
Sometimes people ask me for romantic advice. My advice? Hang your future girlfriend’s painting right-side up for God’s sake.
you asshole [x]
It’s called the TARDIS. It can travel anywhere in time and space. And it’s mine.
- me: i have no classes with anybody i know
- my parents: that's how you make friends!!!
- me: no
theweepingangelwhofellforburgers:
elphabaforpresidentofgallifrey:
Tumblr asks the real questions
Everyone on this website is a phycopath I swear
*psychopath. Do your research.
*Sociopath. Do yours.
Alright Sherlock, don’t make me get Mummy.
Are YOU my mummy?
No, your mummy is dead because she burned up on the ceiling
